Analysis: Likely Outcome Were Nation to Elect Lifelong Failure as President

A thorough analysis of the facts has brought Mission Critical agents to one undeniable conclusion: If a country were to elect for President, a former coke snorting; serial DWI getting; responsibility dodging (failure to complete Guard Service, for example); chronically failed businessman that is insecure in his manhood, and also a habitual liar, it is most likely that such a person would be a lying failure as President too.

Possible issues were such a person to be elected, follow:

• Economy would tank
• Lie the country to war
• Attempt to cover up the lie by outing spies
• Believe bombs equal a foreign policy
• Employ propaganda, including paying journalists to spin failed policies
• Hire failed horse judges to run FEMA (yes, that actually, hard as it is to believe, was our conclusion based on the evidence)
• Members of administration indicted on charges related to treason issues
• His or her response to natural disasters would be more disastrous than the disaster itself
• The war started on lies would be managed, like a Chinese fire drill
• The armed forces would crumble under the pressure of wars started on lies, and mismanaged beyond belief
• The nations deficit would soar, because he or she along with their Party would give all the nation's revenue back to the wealthiest members of society and big oil
• He or she would convince the nation that science isn't science, and that fairytales starting with, "Once upon a time," are the real basis of how humans came to be

Sadly, there was more, but our agents have become so depressed at the thought of such a scenario that they refuse to continue.

Summary: Don't elect life-long failures, because if the nation does, they will have a failure for President.

End Analysis